I’m in the process of reading The Language of Love & Respect as part of my participation in the Thomas Nelson Blogging program. I was reading the initial chapter which is a review of the Love & Respect book. A point was made that stuck out to me.
The author was talking about his relationship with his wife and how he reacts. He put it this way:
Sarah doesn’t cause me to be the way I am; she reveals the way I am. When I am unloving toward Sarah, it’s because I still have issues; I still have more growing up to do. I have a choice: either admit my failure to be mature or play the victim. As a victim I can blame Sarah, or circumstances, or whatever. But, as a victim, I will not become more mature.
What a statement! It is easy for people me to blame others for how they are I am. I’m, by nature, a jerk. I’m 6’2, 240 lbs, with a deep voice and that sets people off very easily. So it is easy for me to be a jerk, even when I’m not trying. Though lets be honest.. there are times I do it on purpose and enjoy it.
It’s easy for me to blame others about my behavior. Its easy for people to blame others for their actions, but the bottom line is that the individual is responsible for their own action.
The bottom line is that I am responsible for my own actions and nobody else.