Chapter 2 is titled, The invisible Dad. A story about the authors father.
It opens up with a quote that I love:
The most urgent domestic challenge facing the United States at the close of the twentieth century is the re-creation of fatherhood as a vital social role for men.
The authors dad was a drunk and he got stuck many times in between his fathers problems and other members of the family. A very telling quote:
You swallow a lot of pain when at 15 you tell your dad not to come out of his room until your friends are gone. You swallow a lot of pain hiding car keys or disposing of hidden whiskey bottles before the weekend comes. You swallow a lot of pain refereeing fights to make sure no one gets injured.
Must have been tough for him. He then went on to cover the story of his dad’s redemption. One night Robert Lewis was at a gathering of Christians and the question came up about that one prayer you want answered. He said it was for his father to come to Christ, though he had rebuffed him many times over the years. That very night his dad in a drunken stupor shoved his wife (the authors mom) as he walked out of the house after an argument. The mom fell and hit her head on a table, breaking her neck. She layed there for hours until she was able to get some help. The dad didn’t know about it until he got to work the next day, having not gone home. As he was told he had a heart attack and ended up in the hospital. The author quickly flew to the hospital where both parents were. He went in to visit his dad, groggy from drugs. His dad didn’t know who he was, but begin to confess all the bad things he did and brag about his preacher son. The conversation continued and the dad realized he was talking to his son. That was the beginning of the dad’s faith journey. At age 70!
Now what I love about this redemption story is the dad’s reaction to the mom. He knew he didn’t deserve anything from her. If she wanted to leave him, that is what he deserved. Here is the story from the book:
Dad moved out of the home for a year and pledged to earn his way back. He finally began to accept responsibility for is life. He gave up drinking, received professional counseling, and worked to regain Mom’s trust. Eventually he did return home.
That is an example of a person who gets how bad their sin was. I’ve seen the person in this situation have a fake sorrow, this though was a person with Godly sorrow.
Finally the chapter closes with wrapping up the damage an invisible dad can cause. The curse it puts on the children. He closes with this statement and question, which I will close with as well:
I intend to use my hurt for their gain. I intend to make sure the curse of the Invisible Dad goes no further than me.
How about you?
How about you?
[Initially Written 2.15.2009]
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